All the journalists who are saying that Simon Cowell has been the ruination of Cheryl Cole have, to my way of thinking, got it the wrong way round. Simon did everything for Cheryl, made a favourite of her on X Factor, puffed up her non-existent talent until we almost believed him, then gave her a golden opportunity to sit on the panel of the new US X Factor.
He has played Svengali to her eager Trilby, but all along, I have had a nagging feeling that the tiny Geordie poptart would be Simon’s undoing. The nation’s sweetheart has a conviction for GBH. Apart from undoubtedly being a very pretty face, whatever did he see in her? He was blind! Cheryl could do no wrong, but the scales were dropping from the eyes of many of her British fans by the time she decided she wanted to crack America. Cheryl is supposed to be her own woman. But to hear it now, she only tried to keep Simon happy by applying for the US job, and he cruelly used and exploited her.
Now “friends” are rushing to be at her side because, as always, she is “so fragile”, when the truth is Cheryl was a smug and uninteresting judge, with nothing to say. She trotted out the same platitudes about “my little pop star” before loftily turning down contestants who could all sing much much better than she can. Simon really stuck his neck out, and fought US execs. for her for months, while all she did was give interviews that he wasn’t being quick enough because the stress of waiting was making her ill. In the US, he lauded her to the skies. Performing before the audience was the one thing he couldn’t do for her, and that is when she fell flat on her face.
Stubbornly refusing elocution lessons, arrogantly refusing a stylist because she thought she knew better, Cheryl turned up in the US tripping over purple jeans that hid her feet, with a hairstyle so outrageous the Red Cross wouldn’t bring it coffee. She also dumped her respected British agent of six years for black rapper Will I Am. (This is the woman who gave us Cher, a mini-me Cheryl. Let’s see how that pans out.)
Harsh though this sounds, Cheryl has one talent only and she performs that to Olympic standard, she is brilliant at playing the victim. Simon is already starting to look like a fool. His fabled judgment has been revealed as fallible. He backed her and she couldn’t deliver. Not only that, but she insists it is all his fault! Far from being grateful, she says she is hurt, she feels exploited, hints he has treated her as badly as Ashley Cole (I wondered how long it would be before she went down that route…..)
Stuck without a proper panel for the UK X Factor, but also wanting to offer Cheryl a lifeline, Simon is trying to speak to Cheryl, but she is in a major sulk, punch drunk on her own publicity, and she won’t pick up the phone. Simon, let me give you some free advice. STAY AWAY FROM HER! She’s trouble! I never thought I would feel sorry for Ashley Cole, but she managed to make him look a king sized heel by airing every detail and, big brown eyes brimming with unshed tears, she will do the same to you. Dump her from UK X Factor, it would just be sloppy seconds. Cheryl says she is her own woman, so let’s see how far she gets without you propping her up.
Simon, there is a chip in your armour of invincibility, and it is getting bigger the longer you let her jerk you around. The little hand wielding the hammer is Cheryl Cole’s. Be warned. You gave her everything, she blew it and you’re the bad guy. Drop her from X Factor UK. You never stood a chance. Save yourself.
UPDATE: Cheryl Cole will not appear on UK X Factor, as ITV could not negotiate with her because she refused to take Simon’s calls. If someone had helped me as much as Simon has Cheryl Cole, not only would I be deeply grateful, I would be concerned that my poor performance might reflect on them. But she doesn’t seem to give a damn what the repercussions are for Cowell. First, last and always, it is all about her.