Hoon and Hewitt stick their heads above the parapet! The inside story.
According to the London Standard, Geoff Hoon and Patricia Hewitt launched a leadership coup and called for a secret ballot on the PM’s leadership. (report in today’s Standard.)
What really happened. Hoon and Hewitt were caught badmouthing Gordon and one of them called him a Big Cheese. They were immediately seized by Gordon’s Personal Guard, stripped, blind folded and thrown into a pitch dark cell. Meanwhile, their immediate families were rounded up and taken to the top of the Post Office Tower, in sub zero temperatures.
David Miliband has shown outstanding leadership skills in the crisis. He has been fervently agreeing with whoever was the person to speak last. Both Hoon and Hewitt have since “freely” pledged their loyalty and each is blaming the other for the vile slur on their noble leader. “We worship Gordon” said a sobbing Mrs. Hewitt. “Gordon is everything to us!” before being led away by a leather coated loyalist.
Harriet Harman endorses Gordon. “He’s like a lead balloon at an orgy” said the Deputy Leader.