An achingly sad article in the Sunday Times magazine shows that feminism is being pushed backwards. Far from equality, many young women are still in thrall to men, victims of peer pressure, forced to have sex whether they are willing or not. The double standard is still rife. If a boy sleeps with more than one girl, he is “a legend”, but when a girl does the same, she is a “slut” or a “red bitch”.
The article described the easy availability of the morning after pill and the way this has released boys from all responsiblity. They don’t want to use a condom because they say they “want to do it like porn.” The Sunday Times reports that Dawn Clark, a psychotherapist and councillor with the British Pregnancy Advisory Service, confirms she has heard this a thousand times.
It is commendable that schools are teaching pupils about responsible contraception, but it is a huge concern that schools are falling down on teaching girls they have equal rights with the boy. There is no mention of respect, intimacy, feelings, or advice how to stand up for yourself to girls, particularly if the boy is violent, and no word from teachers to boys about equality, or that they should not force girls into sex.
“Sometimes it’s easier just to give in and have sex, rather than have them punch you in the head, and then go off the next day and get the morning after pill” said one of the girls in a chillingly flat tone. “Most men use their fists when you stand up to them.” One girl said: “They only want one thing, then they leave.”
The girls interviewed were girls from difficult backgrounds, whose lives were full of pain. What are schools doing to protect these young women, with their “sex is fun, just don’t get an infection” philosophy? If you don’t get love and affection at home, you look for it wherever you can find it, until you realise casual sex is nothing to do with that. No doubt the schools would argue it is the job of the parents to provide advice on the emotional side. But where does that leave the many kids with no responsible, caring parents to turn to?
This is not equality. This is not feminism. Instead the result is that vulnerable 14 year old girls are giving blow jobs to boys for packets of fags in dark alleys. Kids are now taught about contraception at around ten to eleven years old. Interviewer Eleanor Mills said she found privileged girls she interviewed often dealt with the same problems.
More honesty and openness about sex does nothing but good, and is a big step forward. The total lack of support and advice on the emotional side and on women’s rights can however, turn the new attitude into a double edged sword. somebody has to teach both sexes about the realities of sexual relationships. Because of this “anything goes” attitude to sex from schools, teachers are setting young women up to be victims. Feminism is being pushed backwards, this is not equality and it is the same old sexual slavery all over again.
