Rachel Johnson has just appeared on a Channel 4 programme, bravely tackling an almost impossible task, that of revamping a magazine started in 1885, The Lady.
My heart would quail at the very thought, because the hard core readership of The Lady obviously love the mag. as it was, and would deeply resent any changes. The owner, a man called Charles was clearly a total coward, who wanted many of the existing staff to leave, but didn’t have the guts to do it himself, so dumped this job on Rachel, as the new Editor. He wanted circulation up but seemed to resist any changes.
Rachel’s idea of bringing in the Duchess of Devonshire as an agony aunt was brilliant, but I was horrified at some of the people she put on the cover. Rachel is obviously too much of a lady and far too well brought up to know that in the Charm programme that Sharon Osborne fronted, Sharon punched one of the contestants in the head. She also has a habit of sending a certain substance to people she doesn’t like in a gift wrapped box. The only way I can describe this in a ladylike way is that it is the same substance that went towards the elephant dung stilettos featured here earlier, except that it is Sharon’s own. (or sometimes her kids help out). My source for this is Sharon’s biography, suitably titled Sharon Osborne – Extreme.
Sharon Osborne is possibly the last person who is suitable to be on the cover of The Lady. However, she has certainly led an exciting life, one of the highlights being when, out of his head on drink and drugs, her husband tried to strangle her. I also do not think that Judy Finnegan is a good idea, nor anyone called Kirstie, but that is just my opinion, I would pick older women who are much more substantial, Judy Dench is a brilliant choice. She is very talented, and also beautiful, as is Helen Mirren. Elizabeth Jane Howard would be good too. Vivienne Westwood, fantastic, also Tracey Emin.
For me, I would avoid the sexual jokes and references for The Lady. There is a place for everything, and The Lady for me, isn’t it. Maybe they should try to develop a style of humour specifically for the magazine, as risque writing can be hilarious, but not in this context. Handicrafts are ladylike, couldn’t they introduce those, but in a modern way? And how about bringing in some eco fashion?
Rachel Johnson is forthright, like her brother, it made for great t.v. Rachel, you are brave to take on such a big challenge, and you have managed to increase circulation, so hey, what do I know, probably absolutely nothing whatsoever. If you ever leave The Lady, you should write a sitcom of your time there, the sexy posh totty brought in to save the antiquated Victorian relic while shocking the blimpish staff to the core would be hilarious. And your lack of knowledge about certain episodes of Sharon O’s life proves you really are a lady.